If you think you may have finally slipped into the realms of "stalking", take this fun quiz. Are you an Alan Rickman Stalker? If so is it just a fun thing, or are you a Pro? Take our easy tell-tale quiz and see? Choose the answer that most closely describes your present situation I am currently in a long-term relationship I am currently in a short-term relationship I am currently in an extremely short-term relationship and will fill in the rest of the answers when I have finished what I am doing. You have bought a ticket for Private Lives. Do you: Sit at the back of the circle Sit in the middle of the stalls Sit in the front row and attempt to climb on the stage Your favourite "Alan" movie is on the TV and your 'significant other' will not stop talking (again) do you: Turn up the volume Threaten him that unless he stops talking you will do what you did last time Actually do what you did last time, ie, stick tape over his mouth for the duration of the film Why do you like Alan so much? He reminds me of Frankie Howard He reminds me of my first love I refuse to answer as my lawyers have told me not make any statements You want to travel to see Alan, but you can't afford it. Do you? Sigh... go back to what you were doing Sell your family jewellery Sell your family, their jewellery, other people's jewellery etc., You're having a lovely dream about Alan when you are awoken by your 'significant other' (again) do you? Feel guilty Get up and make a cup of cocoa Pretend he IS Alan and carry on Alan's lawyers have threatened legal proceedings if your behaviour continutes, do you Stop stalking immediately. Sob! Seek an out-of-court settlement. Limiting your actrivities to weekends only Add the lawsuit to the pile of pending proceedings You're invited to meet Alan, but the date clashes with an important family birthday. Do you Regretfully decline the invitation Try to get the Birthday postponed Go anyway. Birthdays - who needs them After an unfortunate theatrical accident involving a bump on the head. Alan has suffered a memory lapse and thinks that you are his long term partner. Do you Tell him you're not. Sigh. Choke back the tears Play along Tell him!! What!!! Are you nuts!! Is the guy who wrote this junk for real? Finally, how would you rate your feelings for Alan (on the Richter Scale) Poorly, Faintly, Weakly Truly, Madly Deeply Daily, Nightly, More often if possible This quiz was originally written and kindly donated by Tony(Doc)Locke, who wrote it for his wife. The "clever bits" which make it all work were done by my husband. Both of them long suffering Alan Rickman widowers. Many thanks to both of you.